Why Me?

John 9:2 His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?"

I have a mental illness. Is it my fault? Is it my mother’s fault? How about my father’s fault? Or did it just happen? Why, out of all of the people in the world, do I have Bi Polar Disorder? What did my ancestor’s do to bring this horrible disgrace on me? (I hope you realize that last line was sarcasm.) When the disciples asked Jesus the above question, in the 15th year of Tiberius' reign, it wasn’t uncommon for people to think that if you had some type of deformity that it had to be brought on you by sin.

John 9:3 "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.

Does this mean that God is going to heal EVERYONE to show that He is great and mighty? We would go out into the world and shout His glory then, wouldn’t we? Well, unfortunately, the answer is no - everyone in the world is not going to be healed of all their ailments. So what does John 9:3 mean? Can we love and worship and surrender our lives to a God that allows us to suffer? I believe that most times that is the greatest testimony to God.

But that leads me to another question: Is it really God that is allowing the suffering? So often, the pain we live with on a daily basis is not pain that God “allowed”. It is pain that is a consequence of human action. He gave us free will and we must live with the consequences of that free will… the consequences of our actions and the actions of others around us.

I have a mental illness and it’s not anyone’s fault. I’m grateful that God has placed me where I am today because I feel I’m doing my ministry everyday here on these pages. Just one person. That’s all I need to reach. Hopefully more. God will put them on this path. I believe that. John 9:3 says so.